The problem: You need military spouse friends who get the crazy military life. Keep reading because: you’ll learn exactly who you need during different seasons of military life!
What are the seasons of military life?
Military life has its own cycle of seasons. Instead of waiting expectantly for spring, we wait hesitantly for PCS orders. While others are longing for lazy summer days, military spouses long for their family to be complete again after deployment.
I have been through quite a few seasons of military life. Probably most of them, at this point. After 5 duty stations, 7 deployments, 5 kids, and several different jobs, I have learned that these seasons just keep repeating. I face the same challenges and the same rewarding moments again and again. Unfortunately, one thing that doesn’t stay the same is the people in your life. I make new friends with every unit and during every deployment, but after a few years one of us always moves.
“I absolutely need friends to survive military life!” ~The Seasoned Spouse
I have learned two things from the ever-changing cycle of military spouse friends. The first is that I absolutely need friends to survive military life. No one can do this alone! Second, I have realized that I don’t always need to have a best friend at each duty station. Instead, I get by with a whole team of friends. When we move, I have to start my team all over again. No matter your season of military life, you will want these friends on your team too!
The friends you need during deployment
The Battle Buddy: Ideally, someone with a spouse in the same unit as yours, so you are going through the trenches together. You can text them late at night because you know they will be awake. They are available for Netflix marathons, crying over communication black-outs, helping you when you hit the deployment wall, and laughing together on Homecoming day.
Workout partner: Everyone wants to lose weight during deployment. It’s a lot more likely to happen with this partner at your side. They will help you make a workout routine and stick to it. They may even join a class at the gym or sign up for a 5K race with you. Matching t-shirts are the best!
Ms. Fix-it: It’s not a question of if things will go wrong; it’s a question of when. And the answer is usually: during deployment. Luckily, this handy friend has a complete tool set and knows a few things about cars. Or her husband does. Either way, they are the ones to rescue you and save the day when the car battery dies or you have to change a tire.
The Adventurer: Deployment is actually a great time to explore the area around your base. Make a bucket list of day trips or quirky local places to visit. This is the friend who is always up for trying something new and getting out of the house.
The Crafty One: Even if you are all thumbs when it comes to crafts, everyone needs a fun, creative friend during deployments. They will teach you how to decorate a care package and will share paint and glitter for homecoming signs.
The friends you need when you are new to a duty station
The Emergency Contact: The first neighbor you meet will probably be listed on all your children’s emergency paperwork for a while, just because they are the only person whose phone number you know in this time zone.
The Local Expert: This friend grew up near the base or has lived here for a while and can tell you what to eat, where to get your hair done, and how to get the best deals. They’ll help you find great deals and dicount programs. They also love to hear your stories about other parts of the country and the world.
Church Friend: Finding a new church that you love can make a new duty station feel like home. This Bible buddy will invite you into the church community, make you feel welcome at meetings, and pray with you when life is rough.
The friends you need when you are a mom
The Playdate President: Every military base has an active mom’s club with a calendar full of activities. Find the club and you will find your new support group. It will keep your kids entertained so you can all sit in the living room and laugh together.
Storytime Sympathizer: Everyone thinks library storytime is important for their toddler, until they actually try it out. You need a friend to roll your eyes at and grin sympathetically with when they play that one song again or your child is throwing a fit.
Classroom Mom: Your child’s classroom is going to have a class mom who volunteers there regularly. Learn who it is, because they probably see your child almost as much as you do, and they understand the complex social drama among the kids in the class. Plus, they are a great ally at birthday parties.
Team Mom: Every team has a mom who organizes the snack sign-up and coordinates the coach’s gift. You are both going to be sitting together on the sidelines all season, so find out what you have in common. They may be the perfect addition to your friendship team!
Which kinds of military spouse friends are you looking for right now?
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